On 5th June, I welcomed the arrival of my second daughter, two weeks before my estimated due date! And so, this post I had originally planned for became so much easier to write for I am truly experiencing the reality of it all now.
Becoming a mother of two definitely is much more challenging than expected, especially when your firstborn is still a toddler. Here are three challenges that I've personally come to experience.
First of all, my time is now divided unequally between my firstborn and my newborn. I am breastfeeding my newborn by direct latching and that demands a lot of my time especially in these initial weeks as we establish a solid latch and milk supply. My firstborn might miss my ability to engage meaningfully with her or even something simple as picking her up. I struggle with trying to be a mother to my firstborn just as much as you are to your newborn. I have to learn how to assure her of my love in the limited amount of time I get to spend with her.
Secondly, I've now got to split duties with my husband now and it's hard to do everything initially as a family unit as we had previously done so. Most of the time, he is the one who spends time with the firstborn while I tend to our newborn. It doesn't help that our firstborn has been recovering from a bad cough and then just caught another virus again during this first week with our newborn. My husband has to bear most of the responsibility in caring for her and therefore misses out on the chance to bond with our newborn. I also miss being able to care for our child side by side with him and long for him to build a strong bond with our newborn too.
Lastly, recovering postpartum whilst having to manage the toddler and a newborn is not an easy feat. I have to give instruction for my toddler not to pounce on me, especially my abdominal area, or gently refuse her requests for me to carry her. It’s even difficult for me to bend over and pat my daughters at bedtime over the railings of their cot. It’s also mentally and physically draining when breast engorgement enters the scene after the milk “comes in” and causes discomfort, and sometimes clogged ducts, which i had. It’s difficult to tend to the needs of both children while bearing the discomfort.
But thankfully, my recovery this time round has been easier with less tears and complications postpartum so far. Furthermore, with the right postpartum recovery products available at hand, such as those in our RESTORE collection, it is so easy to ensure I am healing well and also managing my engorgement issues.
Second-time moms are also learning much as we transit from having one child to two. Show your love today to someone you know who is going through this too and send them something from our RESTORE collection.